When my son Caleb was alive, I dreamed that I was in a crowded place and I was holding Caleb in one arm and passing out loaves of hot fragrant bread to people who were so happy to receive them. Even though Caleb is not present with me, I have memories of all that we learned along our journey together. I pray that, because of Caleb, I will be a blessing to others who are experiencing sickness, need or loss. I can "hand out" the truths from God's Word that comforted me in my time of need.
I hope this makes sense, but I keep remembering the story of Moses. We think of Moses as a great leader whom God used mightily, but God wants to use the "least of us". Even though Moses was adopted into the royal family of Egypt as a infant, he felt very small when God asked him to deliver His message to Pharaoh: "Let my people go!"
Moses asked God, "What if Pharaoh doesn't listen to me?"
God responded with a question, "What's that in your hand?"
God proceeded to use Moses' simple shepherd's staff as He demonstrated His power to the stubborn king of Egypt and the doubting Israelites.
The power was not in Moses' ability or the staff, but in his dependence on God. God simply asked Moses to surrender to him all that he had experienced in life up to that point, and let God be God.
All I have to offer the Lord is "what's in my hand": my life experiences. At times I have made costly mistakes, and caused pain. I have spent too much time regretting the past or trying to figure out the future. But there are times, when I just look to Jesus to make a way, and He places me just where I need to be - to share the "Bread of Life" with someone else.
This Gaither song sums it up.
If there ever were dreams
That were lofty and noble
They were my dreams at the start
And hope for life's best were the hopes
That I harbored down deep in my heart
But my dreams turned to ashes
And my castles all crumbled,
My fortune turned to loss
So I wrapped it all in the rags of life
And laid it at the cross.
Something beautiful, something good
All my confusion He understood
All I had to offer Him was brokenness and strife
But he made something beautiful of my life
..
.
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11 comments:
That is so beautiful, Karen.
Thinking of you, especially this weekend, Karen. May God bless and comfort you. We miss Caleb very much. He continues to bless folks all over the world by you sharing his story on your blog.
Oh, Karen, this is so beautiful and encouraging to me. Your sharing the Bread is such a ministry. The Gaither song is one of my "life songs," too. When we depend on Him and give Him all the pieces, He does indeed make something beautiful . . . maybe not what we expect or "like it used to be," but His artistry is perfect!
May God bring comfort as only He can as you remember your sweet Caleb.
The loss makes us stronger because we have learned to lean harder on Jesus for all that we really don't understand or control. The closer we are to Him the more strength we receive from Him. Thank you for the blessings that you give from this post.
Praying for you.
Such a beautiful post...You have shared in Christ's sufferings in a way many will never understand.
God bless you sister... ~Amelia
This is such a nice post, Karen. Very well said.
this is so beautiful Karen....I think sometimes when we've hurt so much...we can love so much more.
Lovely post. God bless you, Karen.
God certainly uses our sorrows to help others. I love that song by the Gaithers, especially the last four lines. I remember learning that little chorus many years ago and it has always been so meaningful to me. Thank you for sharing your heart.
Blessings,
Charlotte
In our sorrow God makes the devils evil work for His good. I empathize with your hurting heart. May that "something beautiful" bring peace today.
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